JoshEspi.Sonicworx

Going back..

I'm leaving Chaos "again".. Its a tough call.. But I guess I'm no longer needed there.. Or worse maybe I never was needed at all.. After knowing the reason why she came back playing our game (un-confirmed but I'm not that stupid not to know it..).. I'm sure gonna miss her.. She's the sole reason why I got hooked up with this game.. The reason why I turned my back on fame, riches and power.. I admit.. It is because I love her.. I love her that I'm wiling to sacrifice everything.. But there is this one thing I couldn't do.. Sit at a corner and pretend I'm not affected when I know shes hurting.. Many times I tried to take her away from all these hurtings.. but she just keeps on coming back.. Maybe she isnt hurting at all.. Maybe she really is happy with how things are going.. haha I know many who feels happy when they are hurt.. I WAS one of them.. ..I'm leaving.. And this time there is no turning back.. I'm not saying goodbye to her.. 'cause Im scared.. I'm scared tears from my eyes would fall.. and I'd hate that.. I'll just sit here.. pray.. pray that someday I'd bump to her next time I'd go online Lydia.. Then maybe things would be better from then on.. But for now.. I'd just dream on.. 'cause it's the only thing I can do..